I AM MÉTIS

I've been gifted the gift to call myself Métis, not only from my ancestors but all those who fought to stand proud in the definition, Métis.⠀

My father taught me what it was like to be proud to carry the Métis title. Soon after he passed, the shame seeped in. I moved to a non Indigenous community, & I lost traditions & teachings; this is where shame first poisoned me. ⠀

I lived two lives for much of my young childhood. When I was home in the Prairies, I embraced everything I could; I felt closer to my father's spirit then. When I was in Ontario, I shied away from speaking of my father's heritage. People knew of it; I spoke of it only until I heard the judgements, then I started to focus on my mother's background instead.⠀

I don't look the way people would assume. Assumptions, they're a funny thing, they play with your mind & dictate your thoughts without knowing anything. ⠀

Based on other people's assumptions that I don't look Indigenous, I started to believe that there is a certain way Indigenous people should look. Other people's assumptions made me feel shame.⠀

Métis in itself having ties to the meaning of mixed blood, or even hearing the term half breed as a way to explain a Métis carries with it a lot of hurtful baggage. Métis people are more than a European having a child with an Indigenous person. The Métis people are a Nation; we have traditions, culture & a language of our own. We are not a mix of two ancestral backgrounds; we are our own people.⠀

I realized I stood in the shame of who I am for far too long. Shame that is not my burden, shame that was passed down from generations of non Indigenous people and somehow the weight fell upon my shoulders, such a colonial way of being. ⠀

I am not "more Indigenous" now. I am merely standing in who I am. I am unpacking the shame, yet I still have to explain why I choose to no longer suppress the parts of me that my ancestors once had to do. Why do I have to explain why I am no longer standing in the discomfort of colonization?!⠀

I stand in the pride.⠀

I will not silence it.⠀

I AM MÉTIS.⠀